Dowry : Taken with Pride..What is that Car doing there ?

Punjabis are known for their extravagance & lavishness and when it comes to celebrations, money flows like water in Sutlej. This very quality has been showcased by many bollywood movies, as in Vicky Donor where initially the South Indians feel irked by the loudness and unnecessary (for them) craziness of North Indians but at the end find themselves dancing to the tunes of Punjabi songs. Punjabis watching the movie feel extremely happy for they are proud of their loudness ( & they won over the south Indians with their 3 Ds – Dance, Daaru (Whisky) & Dhol). In contrast to what Mr Modi offers with his 3 Ds, unfortunately but proudly Punjab has a different set of Ds to offer.

Coming to a specific quality of Punjabi marriages. Any one going to a marriage has a question in his mind – Gaddi kehri ditti hai ? ( Which Car has been gifted ). You will than find a decorated car at the entrance flying in the face of all social campaigns advocating women empowerment and equality between sexes.

And cars…. Alto, Zen, Nano are lesser citizens among cars for the prosperous state. It has to be a SUV or a Sedan and if it is a BMW or Audi, it is a gift worth praising. Social status is something which is driving this state into all wrong deeds including the lucrative drug smuggling.

The most amazing thing about these marriages is the silent agreement between everyone who is part of the celebrations. You ask them ,”Isn’t it dowry?”, even a child knows the answer “it’s a gift ,not dowry”. One is bound to wonder that why is  such an expensive gift being given by the girl’s family to the bridegroom and not the other way. The ever ready answer is ,” Gaddi tan kudi nu hi milni hai” (Ultimately the girl will receive the car). Such a unanimous sentiment displays how an organised crime is carried out with perfection. And the legislators presumed that they ended this custom, which is said to be one of many causes of the skewed sex ration in North India, the day they passed the law in the Temples of Democracy. What a tragic joke!!!

The sex ratio of Punjab is plunging with every new census warning the state to be ready for what neighbouring state Haryana is facing. No girls, No marriages and finally this gift concept reverses. Now Haryanvi Boys are ready to pay to find a girl to marry, yet many remain unmarried. Even kidnapping and buying girls is not rare these days. It is a gift which is given to younger generations by the elders in return of dowry they (gave and) received. These ‘Missing girls’ are probably going to places like Kerala in these big ‘gifted’ cars where they find a better social place and dignified life.

But such is this proud & boastful community that they will commit a crime (may be sin) and show off to the world, declaring “Yes we take dowry, do whatever you can”. What else is that car at the marriage resort standing for ?

Shutting the debate on feminism with a message to guests , “Continue the tradition.”